Road to Zion

I heard this song via Tom... his music tastes are pretty diverse too. You can really feel the beat. I have been dancing in my seat a little while making a new layout. :P I'm happy with what I've come up with. It'll be finished by tonight (I hope!) if I can figure out all the behind the scenes things - HTML and uploading it to Tom's server.


Damian Marley - Road to Zion





Walking on the road to Zion... yeah, that's what we're doing. Someone commented on the woman's voice in the YouTube comments and I think they are haunting and pull the song together beautifully.

There ya go my dears... possibly my last blog in this place.

Love,
Cathrine

Still Real

I read this article on the SMH website about how listening to music with positive lyrics makes you a nicer/more helpful/considerate person. *laughs* I have known that for ages. It's why I stopped listening to Marilyn Manson, Slipknot, Tool, etc. I got rid of my 'angry/hate' music because it was affecting me too much. A year after I gave up the last remnants of that music, George released their album Unity (2003). It blew me away with it's hopeful message. It contained within it all my deepest longings for beauty, goodness, honesty, truth, nature and love. I listened to it over and over and felt my heart and thoughts change dramatically.


George - Still Real





I still really admire Katie Noonan and her desire to make this kind of music. In a world that is so hurt and hating, she is so different. She hasn't lost her ability to see life's goodness either after so many years of being in the industry or being now married with two young sons. Marriage and children can sometimes distract you from these higher ideals as you get caught up in the busy-ness of life... but I believe she still holds firmly to those ideals. Plus she likes jazz... and the Beatles... haha I think she's great. When I was 18 and listening to this music, she helped me hold firmly onto goodness and believe that was still worth fighting for.

When I listen to music, I often can't help but sing along. The lyrics are powerful, so I thought I'd post them... :)



I wonder how long I can sustain this mystery
I wonder how we thought we'd get here without strife
I try to recall the beauty
that brought us here
And I cling to that, I cling to that, I cling to that for my life

They say they understand the turmoil that unsettles you
And I say you just fulfill your end of the deal
and I'll fulfill mine
Once we reveal ourselves we're so quick, so quick to analyse
I just want you to be free and enjoy this ride

So go on I'll tell you it's alright
Go on, please tell me you're fine
Don't ever let them get you down
'cause everything that really, really matters
is still real

I'd love to see you shine with every possible radiance
And ignore any thoughts that weren't planted by good
And let intention motivate and stimulate, that is all
And let the cloud that hangs above drift off into the sunset
night

So go on I'll tell you it's alright
Go on, please tell me you're fine
Don't ever let them get you down
'cause everything that really, really matters
is still real


Love,
Cathrine

I Know You Are, But What Am I?

I'm home again. The Philippines was incredible. I met my mum's family for the first time. I met my uncles... one of them in particular is really into music. He sang in choirs from primary school right through to university and he bought me three CDs of a Filipino singer he likes. Her name is Regine Velasquez. :) I looked at him and felt a sort of kinship that I did not expect to experience. This is what it is to have family! He really took care of mum and I too, taking us out almost every day. He took us to dinner and bought us ice creams. We went for walks at night around the local parks - a whole truck load of us (we often travelled in groups of 10+ people). He took mum and I to the night markets and to their huge malls (SM! - Super Mall)!

I also met loads of cousins and great aunts and uncles (I have around 24). We sang karaoke at every party and danced to the same pop songs until I was nearly destroyed by them - Nobody But You, I Got A Feeling, Poker Face, etc. It was fun, but crazy! I spent so much time around people that I nearly lost myself. I became so much more outgoing and brave. I really didn't get as much time as I'd hoped to spend in bible reading and prayer. I was almost never alone!

I came home and have found myself stronger for the time spent away. I feel more confident in my decisions. Is it because I know better who I am? :) I also now have a deeper understanding of where my mum comes from and why she thinks and acts the way she does. I saw lots of things in her that I admire and love about her. She's naturally generous and is able to at times say "this is what God has done for me" without self-consciousness. It surprises me, when her faith shows it's face. It suprises me when mum lets go of her fear of spending money and sees how she is able to help and do good and does it cheerfully.

And I came home to Tom. Two weeks away may seem like a short amount of time in the grand scheme of things but it's funny what time can do. Not having him there showed me even more how much I love him being a part of my life. I value so much what we have. Since my return I've had so much fun with him, sharing our excitement and passion for life/art/God. I am filled to the brim. I feel like I'm home in so many senses of the word. I feel very lucky. :)

So I spent some time this afternoon buying music... I got a $20 iTunes gift card in my bible study secret santa and I bought this song. It's an instrumental piece I found a long time ago and had forgotten about. I quite like the video made to go with it.


Mogwai - I Know You Are, But What Am I?





I'm also planning to pack up and move. I asked Tom for a subdomain from his shupface website and I have hopes that it'll be up in a week or two. It'll cover more topics than music including - nature, art and poetry also. :)

See you 'round,

Cathrine

Last Night in Sydney for 09

Well, my lovelies... what a year it has been. This is my last night in Sydney, I fly out tomorrow for the Philippines and will return early January. I have to say this has blossomed into such a beautiful year. I can look back in gladness to the growth that I've experienced as a teacher at my workplace and in myself spiritually and generally. I left work on Friday with such warmth and love from my boss, the parents, and my wonderful children. I miss them already because I know it'll be three weeks till I see them again and some of them are going to school and won't be coming back! Luckily I still have time with my shadow before I have to leave next year for full time study. I'm carrying the look she gave me as I left Friday evening in my heart... the "quick, one last hug because you're going and ahhh, don't leave without a hug" look. She makes my heart ache, I love her a lot. And one of my boys on Thursday said to me a hastily phrased, "thank you for being with me all those days!" when giving me a hug before I went home. So precious! He's taken to randomly saying, "I love you Cathrine", which is just gorgeous. I love how unconscious children are in the giving and taking of love.

And Tom. :) I'm continually surprised by him. There is just so much love here, it's wonderful. He has encouraged and strengthened me to grow in ways I never would have without him. I am lifted up. I'm really satisfied with where life is heading. I have been longing for a firm foundation in God to stand on for years and I feel it forming for the first time. It's beyond exciting. I love the support I get from my new church, the community and the love I get from Tom. Having the independance to explore my relationship with God with what I already know and without the burdens of not being good 'enough' or doing 'enough' has been really helpful.

I am so proud of myself for sticking this year out. It was so hard at work at times but the satisfaction I now feel for making it and even doing a good job at times makes it worthwhile. And the growth I see in the children and the relationships I've been able to form with parents for the support of their children. My job is so rewarding... for all it takes out, it gives back so beautifully and in ways I could never receive any other way. You can't buy the love of these children, the laughter and good times. :) I think they know I heart them.


I'm worried about this trip though. So worried I can't think clearly. Apparently worry and stress will do that to you. Reflecting on all that I have done and can do is helpful though. Maybe that's why the psalms are full of that... when times are hard, remind yourself of God's amazing power by reflecting on all that he has done for his people. I'm not going to trust in my own strength to get through this, because that's only good for so much... and I'm going to need a lot more to deal with some of the family dramas that I forsee happening. I'm going to need some more help so as I pack, I'm going to pack while listening to hymns and trusting/ reflecting on God's ability to take care of me and my family. How many times did God's people forget and try to do things on their own strength? It's a hard lesson to learn...

Tom and I went to a Nine Lessons and Carols service at church tonight, quite an Anglican service format but it wasn't so traditional. One hymn that I loved, I want to share now. I couldn't find an amazing, polished copy of it on YouTube but this might do... it's simple and kinda neat for that.


W.Y. Fullerton (1857-1932) I Cannot Tell




Love,
Cathrine

Jolene

Il etais un fois...

There was once a time when people looked at me at work and asked "how do you get so much done?" Now I feel like I'm dragging my heels. I'm so ready for a holiday. I've taken to writing myself to do lists, so I can use that sense of satisfaction of crossing it off the list as a motivator to get things done. And so far it's helping. :P

I think I'm going to start counting the days till I leave. I work four days a week and there is only 7 more working days till I'm finished for the year. I think I can manage that. :P

This year has been so full on. To illustrate perhaps why this has been such a full on year... I am the only teacher from my room to have been there at the start of the year. It's a normal thing in child care, with the notoriously high staff turn over rate but gah! I wish it were otherwise. Things would settle down and then another thing would distrupt the room. I'm glad I stuck it out. We've had some crazy times but by and large, I've enjoyed working at my centre.


An example of an awesome moment:
This morning our stick insect shed it's skin and one of the children saw this and told me a stick insect was eating another stick insect! I freaked out but when I saw what she meant, I was excited rather than scared. It looked as if it was eating another insect because it was eating it's old skin. I didn't know they did that... that is, ate their old skin. :)

Ah dear...

This is a song I think I should buy, I think it's grand.


Ray LaMontagne - Jolene




Love,
Cathrine